


To Be Someone

by Jen425



Series: Greater Transgressions [7]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Drama, F/F, F/M, Gen, M/M, Multi, Rescue!, nonconsensual but well meaning mind touches
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-06
Updated: 2019-01-06
Packaged: 2019-10-05 14:43:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17326934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jen425/pseuds/Jen425
Summary: Somehow, Anakin wakes up.





	To Be Someone

**Author's Note:**

> The actual reason Ani wakes up is that he needs attachments and connections like a nutrient because of his Force genes, but the characters don’t know this.

When Anakin opens his eyes, he doesn’t see a thing. Just blur. And Force forbid he hear anything. It’s… it’s terrifying, especially as he tries to sit up and  _ it doesn’t work. _ he struggles, hard, body slowly responding as he writhes. There are hands on him and he _still_ doesn’t know what’s going on.

 

He struggles harder.

 

Until his sight and voice begin to return, but by then someone’s holding him onto the bed with the Force.

 

Obi-Wan is, in fact.

 

“Calm down, Anakin,” Obi-Wan says.

 

“Please, Ani…”

 

“This is nothing like a holo…”

 

“Master....”

 

The words slur and jumble in his overwhelmed and unclear mind.

 

“Here,” he manages to get out. “I…”

 

In moments, he finds himself in someone’s arms. The others are still around him. He lets out a quiet whimper as they run a finger through his hair, moving his hand to their heart. He doesn’t understand.

 

His vision and senses clear a bit more, and he realizes that Fives is holding him. His Fives. Around him are Padme and Obi-Wan and Kelna and even…

 

Ahsoka.

 

Anakin can’t think straight. Everyone that he loves… wait. That’s wrong. He’s merely… attached.

 

Right?

 

What…

 

“What’s happening?” he slurs. “You shouldn’t be here. The Council…”

 

The Council had said that he wasn’t supposed to be around them, so they shouldn’t be here. Because he always listens to the Council.

 

…Right?

 

“You were dying, Anakin,” Kelna says, gently. “They were here to say goodbye.”

 

What? He’d just been leaving the Council Chambers to meditate…

 

Except why is he here? And why is he so weak. His mech arm is missing. They shouldn’t be here. He doesn’t know what to do—

 

“Anakin,” Obi-Wan says, clearly, and Anakin calms. His former Master is on the Council. He can listen to him. He can figure out what’s going on.

 

Fives runs his hand through Anakin’s hair once again and Anakin purrs. This is right. Safe.

 

Except…

 

“No,” Anakin says,trying and failing to pull away in his weakened state. “‘M not supposed to be with you. The Council said. I have to listen to the Council. I don’t love you. I’m only attached.”

 

This is wrong. This is right. He’s so  _ confused _ .

 

Padme sighs.

 

“Oh Ani…” she says.

 

Everyone is looking around at each other, and Anakin has no idea what they’re thinking.

 

“Anakin,” Obi-Wan say. “When did the Council tell you this? I wasn’t there, I know.”

 

Anakin feels a wave of fear fill him, but he can’t explain why. Nonetheless, he has to answer the Council Member's question.

 

“7 days after Ahsoka left,” he says. “I was too attached, so they fixed me.”

 

Obi-Wan looks sick. Everyone feels so… horrified. Anakin instinctively curls closer to Fives like it will protect him, and then he curses himself for doing so.

 

It’s Padme who says it.

 

“We have to get him out of here,” she says.

 

“What?!?!!” Anakin cries, struggling once again.

 

“ _ Anakin _ ,” Obi-Wan says. “Calm down.”

 

Anakin immediately goes limp.

 

“Yes, Master,” he says. (But why do the words feel like pain?)

 

“I’ll get a hover chair,” Kelna says from behind him. He’s too weak from his struggles to look.

  
  
  


Obi-Wan’s thoughts are too jumbled to think as they slip Anakin through the halls of the Temple. Walls that had once felt familiar now flicker in an unfamiliar haze as they get to the speeders Padme and Fives had used to get here.

 

Anakin slumps against Obi-Wan’s side, Ahsoka driving and Padme in front. Kelna and Fives are right behind them in the military-issued speeder. Anakin whimpers, shivering from the air rushing around them, and Obi-Wan wraps his Former Padawan in his own brown cloak even tighter.

 

“It’s okay, Anakin.” he say. “We’ll be at Padme’s apartment soon.”

 

“Angel…” Anakin whispers, almost too quiet to hear. “I’m not supposed to love her.”

 

All of this feels wrong, deep in the Force. But all Obi-Wan can do is clutch Anakin closer.

 

But they make it to the apartment soon enough. Anakin let’s Obi-Wan carry him gently to the bed on Padme’s directions.

 

“Anakin,” Obi-Wan says softly. “May I see your mind?”

 

Anakin shivers, but he releases his shields. Overwhelming fear fills the room and Obi-Wan can recognize almost every presence in the completely changed landscape of Anakin’s mind.

 

And, too horrified and overwhelmed by Anakin’s powerful and implacable fear, he rips every foreign power from his former Padawan’s mind at once.

 

Anakin goes limp in his arms.

  
  
  


Fives is not prepared for, not a moment after whatever Kenobi does ends, Kelna to smack the Master in the face.

 

“You kriffing idiot!” she yells. “Do you have any idea what you’ve done to him, just ripping everything out like that?”

 

Kenobi looks too shocked to speak.

 

“I…” he begins. Kelna just waves her hands.

 

“Forget it,” she says. “You explain what happened in another room, and I’ll do damage control.”

 

Kenobi nods.

 

“Yes, of course,” he says. “I’ll… I’ll try.”

 

And Fives knew it was bad, knew it had had to be some kind of reconditioning, but he hadn’t been sure  _ what _ and hadn’t even been allowed near enough to understand more, but…

 

This is something else.

 

Complete restructuring of his cyare’s mind. How… dear  _ Gods _ , how is that even possible?

 

Kriffing Jedi. Kriffing Force. Kriffing… kriff. His brothers. The 501st.

 

It’s one thing for a legion to disband when they lose a General, but they should be getting one  _ back _ . And, okay, he’s really missed his brothers.

 

But… they’ll need a place to stay.

 

Fives turns to Padme..

 

“I need your help with something.”

  
  
  


Kelna wants to be sick as she sifts through Anakin’s mind, careful not to look at any memories that she doesn’t have to. She locks all the too-painful bits under her own invention but leaves her friend’s core principles and happy memories free.

 

Force…

 

And she knows he’s not the only one.

 

Eventually, however, she cleans up Anakin’s broken mind, letting each of her shapes and shields radiate with their foreignness. She forces herself to stand up strong as she returns to the others in the living room.

 

“He’s resting,” she says. “And I did all that I could for his mind. Someone should be there when he wakes up… where’s Fives?”

 

“He’s gone to get the 501st,” Ahsoka says. “And the 212th. Without Anakin and Master Kenobi, they’ll be disbanded.”

 

Kelna nods. Right. But, on that note…

 

“Actually…” she says. “I need to go back to the Temple. I don’t know how widespread this is, but… I can say with certainty that I know at least two others affected. Do you have room for 11 more people here, Senator?”

 

(Akemi must have found the truth. If only Kelna had  _ listened _ … oh. Dear Force. Kelna herself was next.)

 

Padme nods.

 

“Of course,” she says. “It’s the least I can do.”

  
  
  


Ahsoka sits at the end of the Senator’s bed and wills Anakin to wake up again.  _ Force, _ but she’d thought he was  _ dying _ , and then he  _ woke up _ , but he was  _ reconditioned _ and  _ was it because of her? _

 

But she knows the truth.

 

It was.

 

Anakin would probably say otherwise. He always knew how to cheer her up when the Jedi’s stupidity weighed on her. And it  _ was _ a lot of stupidity, she knows, now.

 

Her Master looks so unbelievably unrecognizable like this, his body so obviously weakened.

 

She hates it.

 

And, of course, she’s so focused on her thoughts that she doesn’t notice Obi-Wan enter the room until he puts his hand on her shoulder.

 

“Ahsoka,” he says softly. “Why don’t you get some sleep, young one?”

 

Ahsoka hmphs. She’s not a young one, anymore. She’s a legal adult for a togruta, and any of her remaining innocence was crushed about seven months ago.

 

( _ “So you’re calling yourself old, Master?”  _ asks an echo of Anakin’s voice in her head.)

 

“Don’t worry, Ahsoka,” Padme says. “We’ll wake you when he does. There wasn’t much time for reunions, before.”

 

Ahsoka nods. She hadn’t slept in 48 hours when Padme had found and contacted her, and any she had gotten, next to what she’d thought would be her former Master’s death bed, had been less than a tooka nap.

 

“Promise to wake me up?” she asks. Padme nods.

 

“Of course,” she says.

  
  
  


Padme sighs. She can’t sit her and look at Anakin like this for much longer. Two days is more than enough. She slowly gets off the bed.

 

“I think I’m gonna wait for Dorme,” she says to Obi-Wan. “I do need to catch up on what I missed in the Senate.”

 

Obi-Wan nods.

 

“Of course, Senator,” he says. Padme just sighs again.

 

“Please just call me Padme, Obi-Wan,” she says. Obi-Wan smiles.

 

“Okay,” he says.

 

And Padme leaves, sitting in the dark of her living room, not even bothering to turn on the lights. When Dorme does get there, she doesn’t even bother to look.

 

“Padme?” Dorme asks. “Oh my love, did he pass?”

 

She shakes her head.

 

“Oh Dorme,” she says. “If only it were that simple.”

 

She sighs.

 

“I didn’t tell you the truth,” she says. “Because I thought it was impossible. Anakin can’t lie to me… but the Council called him in. He came back… strange. He said he could never see me again, I… but he could never lie to me. The Council… they broke him. Anakin… somehow, he woke up. The  _ brainwashing _ had worn off enough for him to tell us… he’s in our room.”

 

Dorme sighs.

 

“Oh my love…” she says.

 

And, with her wife to comfort her, Padme finally lets herself cry. For everything that Anakin had lost and everything that she herself had.

 

Nothing is okay.

**Author's Note:**

> Tumblr: @flaim-ita or @ani5s for Ani/Fives 
> 
> Pillowfort: Flaim


End file.
